Saturday, 3 September 2011

Inception for me?

Once I met Leonardo da Vinci, many years ago. I was actually having my breakfast, when he knocked my door that morning. He wanted to show me his latest invention at that time, the Time Machine.
At that time almost the whole world was waiting for such a kind of thing, and why not? Many of them wanted to see how future looked like, and most of them were interested to see the world after the end of Mayan calendar, etc.
Well da Vinci had my day, and I too was all over him for his new invention. I was too excited as he selected me to perform his practical, but a little scared too. So, I stepped into his time machine and he pushed a lever, the machine made a motoring sound. At that time, I thought for once, that why would da Vinci want to see the future. He said, “OK, 3…2…1”, and he pressed some levers, moved a couple of gears, clockwise and anticlockwise in absurd manner. He asked me where did I want to go, and I replied, “I want to be a gladiator of the future”. And then, I closed my eyes, because I was getting too scared, and then I felt a ride. My eyes were closed until the zooming motor sound ended, and when I opened my eyes minutes later, there was no da Vinci. Instead, there were lights all around, a few over my head, and the rest flashing all around. Someone then announced, “And on the other end, we have the heavyweight champion, Mike Tyson”. I then saw how the gladiators in future looked like… A gong sounded thrice, and suddenly I realized that I had a vast knowledge of punching and boxing. I started this first round with deadly combos of punches, jabs and uppercuts, and without getting hit even a single time by the heavyweight champion, I knocked him out in the first round only. I then watched his lifeless-seeming body and thought how would’ve he felt after losing against an amateur debutant. I would’ve surely committed a suicide if I was him.
So, I decided now to return to da Vinci and tell him my experiences of the future, but, the ground beneath me swept off as I saw the machine disappear in front of my eyes. And then suddenly, the earth started shaking, water streams smashing inside through the arena windows, there was chaos everywhere, But I stood still, as if I was waiting for what was happening, and then a huge tsunami like splash hit me very hard, and took me away with it… and then, I opened my eyes, only to realize that I was dreaming, and in front of me, was sitting Leonardo diCaprio, with his famous dream machine that he used in “inception”.
“Oh God”, I said, “I should’ve known this”… a conversation started as follows:
Me: What did you incept now?
DiCaprio: I made Tyson quit boxing.
Me: What did you get from it?
DiCaprio: I had some land and property issues with the boxer, If he’d quit boxing, he can only invest by selling his property, that’ll automatically come to me.
Me: Who was da Vinci then?
diCaprio: Your projection of an intellectual man in your dream.
Me: Where were you in the dream?
diCaprio: Didn’t you see the names- Leonardo diCaprio and Leonardo da Vinci?
Me: And the time machine?
diCaprio: That was your projection too, of a dream machine.
Me: So the boxing match was a dream?
diCaprio: Yes.
Me: So, it was a dream within a dream?
diCaprio: No! It was a dream within a dream within dream…

Mom: C’mon son, you need to get up now, you’re already late for the college…now you get up or I’ll call your father to give you a thrash before breakfast.
Dad: (shouting) This boy watches boxing all night and then sleeps then and there on the couch, and waking up late in the morning…………..
And then I opened the newspaper, to see the sports section headline, that said, “MIKE TYSON QUITS BOXING, SELLS LAND TO HOLLYWOOD ACTOR diCAPRIO FOR FUTURE INVESTMENTS”…
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------PS: I knew this was boring… ;) :P

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